Behind the Paper Screen / Japan's 'culture of shame

Behind the Paper Screen / Japan's 'culture of shame' : The Language Connection : Features : DAILY YOMIURI ONLINE (The Daily Yomiuri): "The Language Connection

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I'm not sure how valid the analysis is shame vs. guilt however it does raise a few points of interest for discussion.






Behind the Paper Screen / Japan's 'culture of shame'
Sawa Kurotani Special to The Daily Yomiuri

In this column I would like to share my thoughts on Japan from the perspective of an "insider outside"--the insider's knowledge of someone who was born and raised in Japan, and the outsider's insight as an American-trained cultural anthropologist.

There are many things that you can only see from a distance, and the Japan that I see from this perspective sheds light on some aspects of the country that I never understood while growing up there. I am also fascinated by the significance of Japaneseness in this increasingly globalizing world, and many of my essays will reflect these interests.

It is a familiar scene in Japan: young children screeching and running wildly about in a public place, as their parents placidly look on. If you ever try to ask them to stop, they look at you as though you are the devil himself, and run back to their parents crying. Parents chastise their children, while glancing at you now and then; somehow, you are left with a nagging feeling that you ended up being the "bad guy." Or, you look at those Japanese teenagers and young adults who sit, eat, apply makeup, and even brush their teeth on the busy streets of Shibuya, Tokyo, as literally hundreds of people walk by, and ask yourself, "How can members of this otherwise polite society be so inconsiderate?"

You are not the first to be confused by the "contradictions" in Japanese behavior. During World War II, the U.S. Office of War Information found Japanese so puzzling that it commissioned a study of Japanese national character. Cultural anthropologist Ruth Benedict took on this assignment, and her research was later published as The Chrysanthemum and the Sword. Benedict's most enduring contribution to Japanese cultural studies is her classification of Japanese culture as a "shame culture," as opposed to Western "guilt culture."

In the latter, she argues, individual members of society internalize the absolute moral standard with which they judge their own actions. In the "shame culture," by contrast, there is no absolute right or wrong that applies to everyone equally under any circumstances; instead, an individual action is judged "situationally," or relative to the specific social context, and the evaluation of an individual action depends on the reaction of the others who surround the individual.

Commonly used idioms reflect how important it is for Japanese to be mindful of the evaluating eyes of the others and avoid shame or haji. There is nothing worse than to haji o sarasu (expose one's shame in public); one is forced in desperation to haji o shinobu (to endure shame); and a haji shirazu (a person who doesn't know shame) is the lowest of lowlifes. Shame has a cumulative effect as well: haji no uwanuri (a coat of shame over another) implies that, if not careful, one can end up covered in layers of shame.

Haji is a central theme in the Japanese socialization process, and children are encouraged to worry about what others think about them from early on. If you were able to catch what the parents were saying to their "screeching children," more than likely, you would have found them telling their children that "other people" (i.e., you) are laughing or upset at him or her, or perhaps, that parents were feeling ashamed because of their children's poor behavior.

Either way, children are being taught to mind, first and foremost, the fact that other people thought poorly of this behavior. I certainly felt the weight of my "shame culture" while I was growing. It was hazukashii (shameful, disgraceful) not to make a good grade, but it was also hazukashii to ask a question in the classroom (as students seldom asked questions in those days). It is hazukashii to go to a funeral wearing anything but black (panty hose included). It is hazukashii to greet a neighbor in too loud a voice, but it is even more hazukashii to fail to greet her. It seemed as though, no matter what I did or how hard I tried, I always ended up feeling hazukashii.

Both guilt and shame have their own limits in defining and regulating appropriate social behavior, but for different reasons. Guilt falters when a person fails to internalize the set of shared values as the absolute standard of conduct; and when this happens, there is no other mechanism to keep people's behavior in check. The situational nature of shame does not make it the sole responsibility of an individual to behave appropriately, but rather makes it a communal responsibility.

The limitation of shame, then, has to do with the perception of the "community" or the group of "others" whose opinion matters to the self. "Inconsiderate behavior" in the situation of anonymity demonstrates how shame does not extend beyond this perceived "community." Traveling is another situation in which the disconnection from the community allows Japanese individuals to behave poorly. As the old saying goes, tabi no haji wa kakisute, or "the shame incurred while traveling can be easily discarded and forgotten."

Lack of haji may also be the product of a deeply felt sense of marginalization within contemporary Japanese society. Street youth, whom I described earlier, can act the way they do without feeling hazukashii, because they feel little connection to the rest of society, and therefore, from their perspective, it was as though there was no one else around.

Similarly, ever-present chikan, or "perverts" on the trains, demonstrate that otherwise inconceivably lewd conduct becomes perfectly conceivable in this vacuum of social relations where people tightly wrap themselves with an impenetrable barrier of indifference in this transitory space between home and work.

"Shame" in Benedict's rendition carries a heavy moral significance, which leads Japanese individuals to do anything possible to avoid it or to conceal it from others' knowledge. Contrary to her argument, Japanese love to talk about their experiences of haji, and even loudly exclaim "Hazukashii!" not only when they are "ashamed" and "disgraced," but also when they feel "embarrassed," "bashful," "awkward," and perhaps, "socially inept."

Hazukashii, in other words, encompasses all kinds of occasions in which the presentation of one's social self has been breached. This breach of self-presentation may range from grave to trivial, but it happens to just about everyone on a daily basis in a society where the rules of appropriate conduct are rather narrowly defined. It is curious, however, that instead of trying to conceal such experiences they are publicly announced and actively shared.

"Shame culture" tolerates human faults as only "situational," and does not condemn the entire person when his or her conduct is less than perfect. Thus, by exclaiming "hazukashii" and making their shame, embarrassment or social blooper shared knowledge, Japanese can, in fact, strengthen their connections with others and lessen the burden on their souls.

If only I had known this as a teenager...


Kurotani is an assistant professor of anthropology and director of Asian studies at University of Redlands in California.

(May. 18, 2006)

Northwest Ireland: Walks and Waterfalls

Northwest Ireland: Walks and Waterfalls and some pictures of kitesurfing












The article comes from MSN travel.
The pictures come from windthings --- a kitesurfing blog.
The only link between the two is the location. It also the one part of Ireland that I've least seen.

Kiss the Blarney Stone, have a pint at the Guinness Brewery and stay in a castle on a wind-swept green hillside. But if you want to see real Ireland, make a stop here.
By Sheila Flynn, Associated Press Writer

One Family's Guide to Ireland
Ireland, by Tour Bus

Kiss the Blarney Stone, have a pint at the Guinness Brewery and stay in a castle on a wind-swept green hillside.

But if you want to see real Ireland, make a stop here.

In a country chock-full of kitschy shops catering to tourists, much of the nation's Northwest remains untouched. And it boasts astounding scenery, friendly locals with strong rural accents and a sleepy peacefulness despite being near a surprising number of things to see and do.

The town of Blacklion in County Cavan, population 166, borders Northern Ireland and is a perfect example of one of the Northwest's quintessentially Irish towns—complete with a one-street strip peppered mostly with pubs, a small tourist center and not much else. It is Blacklion's location in picturesque lake country, as well as its proximity to various attractions, that make it a perfect stop for relaxation and sightseeing.

A walking path, snaking up from the town between two rather unremarkable buildings, could easily be missed by passers-by. But the path marks an entrance to the Cavan Way, a 16-mile trail that leads hikers through hills and valleys, past everything from crumbling stone houses to Megalithic ruins (ancient structures made from giant slabs of stone). Points of interest along the Way include the Shannon Pot, the tiny body of water that marks the start of the country's famed Shannon River, and forests where you can find ancient tombs and stone monuments.

Even just a partial tour of the Way, up from the town and down back onto the main road, provides trailgoers with breathtaking elevated views of cottage-dotted hills and sparkling lakes, all the while leading them past sheep-filled pastures and hauntingly beautiful abandoned cottages—the overgrown, forgotten remnants of families who "bought steam," leaving the area to immigrate by ship to America, England or Australia.

"It's an area that I think doesn't get a lot of attention from visitors, which kind of makes it even more special," said Tourism Ireland spokeswoman Ruth Moran, citing the path's attractions "from ancient times."

"Just from walking along there, people say that they get goosebumps."

And hungry hikers won't be disappointed with the culinary offerings in Blacklion, which happens to boast one of the country's premier gourmet restaurants, MacNean House & Bistro. Celebrity chef Neven Maguire, a familiar face on Irish television who also happens to be a local, places particular emphasis on incorporating regionally grown ingredients into creative contemporary Irish cuisine—drawing dining connoisseurs from across the country to the village. Restaurant hours vary, however, so diners should plan carefully and call ahead.

Visitors interested in more casual fare can stop into any of the multiple pubs in the town for a toasted sandwich or stroll to the local chipper, serving greasy food and fries across the bridge—which is also across the border, in the equally small town of Belcoo, in Northern Ireland's County Fermanagh. Along the way they'll pass the beauty salon that used to be the local one-room schoolhouse, and on the return trip visitors can stop into Blacklion's version of a general store, selling everything from postcards to Wellington boots to dolls—and whose owner, Harold Johnston, can provide more than a few bits and pieces of local history and anecdotes.

A stop in the local bars, which occasionally offer traditional music, will also give visitors the opportunity to enjoy a pint and chat with the locals—who will hurry to put out their cigarettes (banned in pubs nationally) when new faces enter.

Other attractions include touring the Marble Arch Caves and lake fishing. But one of the most impressive activities is as simple as a leisurely drive west along N16, the route from Blacklion to Sligo. The road winds through County Leitrim beneath canopies of trees and provides views of misty valleys and mountains. Scenic overlooks invite you to stop and take the perfect photograph.

About halfway through the hour-long drive, look for a small sign on the right for Glencar Waterfall. A narrow, twisting lane leads down the valley to the 50-foot falls, nestled near a clear, quiet cove called Lough Glencar. The peaceful lake and tranquil falls inspired William Butler Yeats to mention the waterfall in his poem "The Stolen Child."

The county of Sligo, itself, is a bit more popular with travelers, famous for its association with Yeats—who grew up in the area and is buried at Drumcliffe, under the mountain of Ben Bulben, which can be seen from the N16 drive. Signs directing you to the grave are everywhere in Sligo, which also boasts the Yeats Memorial Building on Hyde Bridge and other attractions for literary pilgrims. Visitors have their pick of restaurants and shopping in Sligo's town center, too.

But it is the drive back to the country—with the silence, scenery and sweet scent of peat burning on a fire somewhere as you pass by—that prove most memorable and that represent the real Ireland so many visitors hope to find.
If you go…

IRELAND'S NORTHWEST: http://www.irelandnorthwest.ie/ or (011) 353-71-916-1201. Tourism offices for Ireland in the U.S., (800) 223-6470.

CAVAN WAY: A 16-mile trail between Dowra and Blacklion in County Cavan; details under "Environment & Wildlife" at http://www.countycavan.com.

MACNEAN HOUSE & BISTRO: Main Street, Blacklion, County Cavan. Phone (011) 353-71-985-3404. Accommodations are also available above the restaurant, with five en suite rooms, about $48.

MARBLE ARCH CAVES: Marlbank, Florencecourt, County Fermanagh; http://www.marblearchcaves.net. Open from late March through September.

SLIGO: http://www.yeats-sligo.com/index.html or (011) 353-71-914-2693. Yeats Memorial Building located on Hyde Bridge in Sligo. Annual Yeats "summer school," with poetry readings and writing workshops, July 29-Aug. 11.

Fear the phone...

Fear the phone, not the doorknob, US germ expert says



Tue May 2, 2006 9:26 AM ET



By Maggie Fox, Health and Science Correspondent

WASHINGTON (Reuters) - Worried about colds, flu and other germs? Go ahead and touch those doorknobs and elevator buttons, but watch out for the telephone, fresh laundry and sinks, a top expert advises.

And while you should always wash your hands before making a meal, many people do not realize that they should do so afterwards also, says Charles Gerba, a microbiologist and clean water expert at the University of Arizona.

"Most of the common infections -- colds, flu, diarrhea -- you get environmentally transmitted either in the air or on surfaces you touch. I think people under-rate surfaces," Gerba said in a telephone interview.

And when they are cautious, they are usually cautious about the wrong things. Germs do not stick where people believe they will.

"Doorknobs are usually on the low side," said Gerba, who has conducted dozens of surveys of bacteria and viruses in workplaces and homes. "I guess they are not moist. Never fear a doorknob."

A recent informal survey of a Reuters office helped him illustrate how microbes take advantage of misconceptions to propagate themselves.

Two computer keyboards, for example, carried far more bacteria than an elevator button, the handles and button on the communal microwave oven or the office water fountain, an analysis by Gerba's lab found.

Keyboards and telephones -- especially when they are shared -- are among the most germ-laden places in a home or office, Gerba said.

LUNCH COUNTER FOR GERMS

"Keyboards are a lunch counter for germs," Gerba said. "We turn them over in a lot of studies and we are amazed at what comes out of a keyboard."

In fact, the average desk harbors 400 times more bacteria than the average toilet seat, says Gerba, whose latest survey focuses on the germiest professions.

"Nobody cleans the desktop, usually, until they stick to it," he says.

Perhaps not surprisingly, teachers have the highest exposure to bacteria and viruses, Gerba has found. Accountants, bankers and doctors also tend to have microbe-laden offices, while lawyers came out surprisingly clean in the germ-count stakes.

Offices are, however, becoming cleaner, Gerba says.

His lab does a simple overall bacteria count for its most general surveys. The person swabs each surface and sends it to Gerba's lab, which then cultures the bacteria in a lab dish.

The growth of whatever bacteria are present can be used to estimate an overall load of germs, including harmless E. coli bacteria -- which are found in the gut and are an indicator of what scientists delicately call "fecal contamination".

Some other bacteria usually present are Klebsiella pneumonia, Streptococcus, Salmonella and Staphyloccus aureus, some of which cause disease and some of which do not. And where there are bacteria, there can be viruses, which can hang onto a clean and dry surface for days and to a wet surface for weeks.

Such knowledge may be particularly useful as experts warn that a pandemic of H5N1 avian influenza may be looming. While the virus currently infects birds almost exclusively, experts say it shows the greatest potential of any virus in decades to cause a human pandemic.

If it begins to spread, basic hygiene would be essential to avoid infection. But viruses are of course invisible to the human eye and Gerba notes that people tend not to know where the most infectious places are.

For example, the bathroom.

"Toilets get a bad rap. So does the door on the way out," Gerba said.

Bathroom sinks, however, are another matter. "Sinks are usually high (in bacterial counts) to begin with," Gerba said. "They have got everything a bacteria likes. It's wet, it's moist. In a home we usually find more E. coli in a sink than a toilet."

Men's rooms, too. "Usually the dirtiest handles in public restrooms are urinal flush handles," he said.

DIARRHEA, NOT GONORRHEA

But urban legends about getting sexually transmitted diseases in a public restroom are untrue, Gerba said. "It's really diarrhea, not gonorrhea, you have to worry about," he said. Commonly found restroom germs include noroviruses, shigella, hepatitis A and Salmonella.

Food preparation is another good way to get germy, especially when handling raw meat, Gerba said.

And few people know just how dirty laundry is -- clean laundry.

"Most people don't realize that they actually should wash their hands after they make dinner and also after they do the laundry," Gerba said.

Americans have moved to short-cycle, cold-water washes to save energy and wear and tear on clothing, but this leaves viruses and bacteria largely intact.

"Water at 140 degrees F (60 degrees C) will sanitize laundry," Gerba said. But only 5 percent of Americans use hot water for laundry.

And viruses such as hepatitis A, rotavirus and bacteria such as Salmonella -- all of which cause stomach upsets and diarrhea -- can easily survive the average 28-minute drying cycle.

These are all carried fecally. "There is about a 10th of a gram of feces in the average pair of underwear," Gerba says. "You don't want to be doing your handkerchiefs with your underwear."

Gerba's studies are often funded by companies that make disinfectants, but Gerba says antimicrobial wipes and alcohol-based gel hand sanitizers do work.

"It has been shown that you can reduce a lot of absenteeism by using hand sanitizers," he says.

"We don't want to make people overly paranoid here," Gerba added. "You can reduce your risk of getting colds and flu by a few simple actions. You are always gambling with germs. You just want to keep the odds in your favor."

Small, midsize firms...

Small, midsize firms need govt lifeline

The Yomiuri Shimbun

In recent years, Japan has seen a sharp increase in the number of small and midsize corporations going out of business, with only a small increase in the number of new companies being established. This state of affairs could hamper efforts to maintain the vigor of the economy.

According to the Economy, Trade and Industry Ministry's "White Paper on Small and Medium Enterprises in Japan" for 2006, there has been a gradual improvement in the business sentiment of small and midsize corporations as a result of their successful efforts to bring themselves out of a deflationary slump. Despite this promising sign, there has been no end to the declining number of small and midsize enterprises.

During 2001 to 2004, around 290,000 companies in this category closed down each year, with about 170,000 companies being set up annually during the period. This means the number of small and midsize corporations decreased by about 120,000 every year during the four years.

Today, there are about 4.33 million small and medium enterprises, a decrease of 1 million from 1986, when the figure peaked at 5.33 million.

The industrial sector of society needs constant refreshment, with new corporations established and existing firms going out of business. This is a natural concomitant to capitalism.

===

Age taking its toll


However, it is disturbing to note that one-fourth of small and medium business operators who closed their companies during the 2001-04 period cited difficulties in finding successors as a reason for closing up shop. A fairly large number of proprietors gave up their businesses despite their companies enjoying good financial health.

The Economy, Trade and Industry Ministry and the Small and Medium Enterprise Agency are considering measures to help small enterprises stay in business, for example, by providing advice in cooperation with chambers of commerce and industry in many parts of the nation.

An organization must be established to help small and medium company owners find strongly motivated personnel from outside to take over their business, instead of expecting them to look for such persons among family members, relatives and employees. This should be complemented by efforts to encourage mergers and acquisitions involving small and medium enterprises, to provide young ambitious persons with greater chances to take over the companies run by older people.

According to the white paper, the average age of owners of small and medium businesses was 58.5 in 2002. The average age of such managers aged 55 and older who expressed their wishes to retire from their business was 65.1.

These figures show that small business owners who started their business during the years of high economic growth have now grown old, meaning a large number of them will retire within the next several years.

The rapid increase in the average age of small and medium business operators may compare with the so-called 2007 problem, namely, the difficulty in passing on to younger employees the skills and expertise accumulated by a massive number of baby-boomers retiring from work. The aging of small business owners may prove to be a turn of events in the Japanese economy.

===

Women, elderly have key role


Increasing the number of new small and medium corporations would do much to prevent a further decline in the number of such companies.

In recent years, a growing number of women and elderly people have been starting business in such categories of industry as the service, wholesale and retail sectors. There has also been a rise in the number of women and aged people who want to establish enterprises.

The key to success in ensuring economic growth for an aging society with a declining birthrate lies in how to put the abilities of women and elderly people into full play. We welcome their eagerness to start businesses. We also place our hopes in the desire of the baby-boomer generation to take on new challenges after they reach retirement age.

The Corporate Law, which took effect this month, has abolished the minimum wage system while also allowing anyone to establish a corporation even if he or she has no capital fund.

The government should further improve its programs designed to help people start business to increase the number of highly active small and medium companies. Doing so will provide momentum for revitalizing the economy.


(From The Yomiuri Shimbun, May 8, 2006)

(May. 8, 2006)

Mt. Atago and Kyoto

Mt. Atago still stands as silent sentinel over Kyoto Basin





Kevin Short

Mt. Atago still stands as silent sentinel over Kyoto Basin

Japan's ancient capital of Kyoto is located in a flat basin, surrounded on the west, north and east by low mountains. The traditional name for the Kyoto area, Yamashiro, is thought to mean "mountain fortress," an image of a natural castle surrounded by mountain walls.

The Kyoto Basin was formed when powerful geological forces caused the mountains to split apart along a deep fault line. Silt, carried by the rivers, then collected in the gap, forming a level plain, about 35 kilometers long in the north-south direction, and about 20 kilometers wide in the east-west. The basin's main rivers, the Kamogawa and the Katsuragawa, drain from north to south, eventually joining the Yodogawa river, which then flows southwest to empty into Osaka Bay.

In the late eighth century, the Japanese Imperial Court was searching for the perfect spot to build their new capital city. The first capital, at Nara, had been abandoned in 784, and a second city, established at Fujiwara in the southwest corner of the Kyoto Basin, had proved unlucky, and was abandoned after only 10 years. This time the court employed the principles of feng shui geomancy to make sure they had the right spot.

Feng shui aspires to ensure peace and prosperity by maximizing the flow of elemental energy, called ki, while blocking the approach of destructive spirits. An ideal location for a palace should be on a level plain, with mountains guarding the approach from the west, north and east, and either mountains or water on the south. Based on these ideals, the northern half of the Kyoto Basin must have seemed almost too good to be true.

The city of Kyoto, then called Heiankyo, was established in 794. The west, north and east directions were anchored respectively by Mt. Arashiyama, Mt. Kibune and Mt. Daimonji. To the south of the palace flowed the Kamogawa. In addition, the crucial northeast direction, from which destructive spirits are most likely to approach, was well guarded by Mt. Hiei.

There was, however, one more direction left to nail down. In spring, a malevolent wind was known to blow from the northwest, bringing pestilence and famine. Fortunately, precisely in this direction stood Mt. Atago, the tallest of all the mountains ringing the Kyoto Basin.

For the past 1,200 years, Mt. Atago has stood silent sentinel over the basin. In addition to guarding the city from dastardly winds, the mountain is also believed to provide a special protection from fires. In addition, during Japan's feudal period, the spirit of Mt. Atago, called Atago-Gongen, was thought capable of bringing victory in battle. Atago-Gongen is often depicted as the Boddhisatva Jizo, but mounted on a war horse wearing a warrior's helmet.

To access the powers of the mountain, a pilgrim must climb the slopes and visit the shrines and temples. According to legend, the mountain was first climbed in the early eighth century by none other than En no Gyoja (En the Ascetic), the founding father of Japanese mountain spiritualism. Later, pilgrimages to Atago became so popular that a Kyoto folk saying goes: "Make seven pilgrimages to Ise in a lifetime, and three to Kumano. But visit Mt. Atago every month." Indeed, stone tablets at the top commemorate frequent climbers, including many for 3,000 times and at least one for 3,500!

Even today, pilgrims and recreational hikers alike follow the historic trail up to the top of Mt. Atago. The trail starts at Kiyotaki, and every cho (about 110 meters) of the route is marked by a stone statue of Jizo, the patron saint of walkers and also of children. Colorful bibs adorn the statues. On most have been written the names and ages of children, along with the simple prayer: "Genki ni sodachimasu yo ni" (That these children may grow strong and healthy).

The cho markers are numbered, with a total of 50 between the start of the pilgrimage (actually about a kilometer or so before Kiyotaki) and the top of the mountain. Rest stops are also provided at frequent intervals, including one where a small shrine is devoted to Taro-bo, a huge tengu or long-nosed goblin said to inhabit the mountain, and another at the remains of one of the many teahouses that once dotted the pilgrimage route.

The path from Kiyotaki up to the top is about 4-1/2 kilometers, and takes about three hours or so at a leisurely pace. Most of the hike is inside the forest, but some excellent vistas open up on the higher slopes. Fortunately, much of the mountain on this side remains in natural forest cover, with a good mixture of oaks, maples and other familiar deciduous trees, along with evergreen oaks and laurels. Look for the yabu-nikkei (Cinnamomium japonicum), with lanceolate leaves that show a distinctive and easily recognized vein pattern.

Atago Shrine, the head shrine for more than 800 branches found all over the country, sits at the very top of the mountain. Enshrined there are many deities, including Kagu Tsuchi no Mikoto, the fire deity from classical Japanese mythology. Motifs depicting wild boar abound on the walls and columns of the shrine, as well as on the wooden ema boards offered for sale at the office. The boar is considered to be a tsukai (familiar, or spirit helper), of the mountain deities.

The route down passes through Tsukinowadera, temple, founded in the early eighth century. Eventually the trail comes out on a forestry road. From here a short side trip leads up to the Kuya Falls, a magnificent thundering plummet named after the 10th-century Buddhist ascetic saint Kuya. On the left side of the falls is a stone statue of En with his two fearsome oni familiars, and high up on the right is Fudo Myoo with his two assistants.

(May. 9, 2006)

Biculturalism

Cultural Conundrums / What to say when it's all too much to stomach

Kate Elwood Special to The Daily Yomiuri

Being bicultural is a magnificent experience. It broadens an individual's perspective, exposes him or her to a much wider variety of ways of thinking and doing, enhances understanding and acceptance. Ah yes, biculturalism represents a doubling of life's ordinary pleasures and brilliant wonders.

On the good days, anyway. On frustrating, maddening days when nothing goes right, being bicultural can be reduced to a matter of darkly muttering, "This would never happen in..." followed by the name of that other marvelous country the bicultural person most unfortunately is not in at the moment--only to realize that on equally exasperating and provoking days in that other splendid nation, he or she has made the equivalent gripe. Ah yes, the downside of biculturalism can be a perennial tendency to find two cultures forever falling short of each other.

Brushes with this type of cross-cultural malaise need not be a totally wearisome waste of time, as picking away at the sources, features, elements, and effects of the dissatisfaction can once more hopefully, eventually, broaden the individual's perspective, expose him or her to a much wider variety of ways of thinking and doing, and so on and so forth, when the initial irritation has subsided a bit. Maybe. At least sometimes.

Several years ago I was back in the United States with tedious business to conduct. At the same time, worrywart that I am, the situation was fraught with tension for me as I did what fussbudgets throughout the world do, which is to imagine every plausible and implausible thing that might possibly go wrong and then become unduly preoccupied with the consequences of each anticipated failure. The upshot of all this fret and anxiety was that I asked the clerk in the United States a whole lot of questions. His patience ran out fairly quickly. "Good grief!" he burst out, "You're all set and there's nothing else to do!"

As I walked away, two thoughts were in my mind: 1) Interesting! People other than the character Charlie Brown in the cartoon "Peanuts" actually use "good grief" to express aggravation, and 2) How rude! This would never happen in Japan.

A few days later I returned to good old Japan where clerks are politely helpful despite my numerous inquiries. Later, I had a chance for some investigation. I asked my students what they did when they were fed up with the actions of somebody as in the case of my erstwhile clerk. They looked bemused so I told them of my own pet peeve, people suddenly coming to a standstill in the middle of a sidewalk oblivious to the other pedestrians trying to get by. If I had known the Japanese counterpart to "Good grief!" I might have resorted to it on more than one occasion. Hmm... They appeared less mystified, but still at a loss somehow.

After giving it some thought many students said they couldn't think of anything that typically happened that annoyed them enough to feel moved to say anything. One student rather shamefacedly admitted that it got on his nerves when people cut in ahead when people were waiting to get on a train, and that--and here he seemed to summon up his courage to confess to it--he sometimes clearly indicated his displeasure.

"What do you do?" I asked, imagining from his hesitant demeanor that I'd be hearing something a bit surprising in its forcefulness. He was an easygoing guy, but those aggressive commuters can be quite obnoxious at times in their quest for a seat so I could well believe he might get ticked off and say some appropriately hard-hitting words. I was curious to know what they were.

Once more he hesitated, then took the plunge. "I go like this," he explained, and made a tsk-ing sound with his tongue. Oh, my! That's telling them off good and proper! He obviously believed so, but to me it seemed a very mild rebuke to the pushers and shovers of public transportation and it made me wonder how many times I might have unthinkingly availed myself of a tsk here and a tsk there without realizing it might have more indignant weight in Japan than in the United States Apparently, tsk-ing can be ticklish.

When behavior is beyond the pale, there are various expressions in Japanese all centered around the same notion--faulty upbringing. At first I thought the popular criticism oya no kao ga mitai ("I want to see his/her parents' faces") meant that the parents would be distressed to know of their child's bad behavior, along the lines of "What would your mother say if she could see you now?" In fact, it means that the parents must be blamed for bringing up such an ill-mannered child. Similarly, osato ga shiremasu yo and sodachi ga wakaru both mean something like "your bad behavior reveals how badly you were brought up."

While mothers and fathers may sometimes be blamed in the United States for not taking proper care to teach their little ones how to act correctly, Americans who are irritated by another's actions tend to pay more attention to the offender's personal defects without referring to his or her developmental circumstances.

The direct rebuke "Were you born yesterday?" sarcastically assumes lack of experience as the reason for ignorance, not bad breeding. Other traditional remarks like "ain't got the sense that God gave a goose," "a day late and a dollar short," and "not the sharpest knife in the drawer" are all playfully disdainful ways to voice exasperation at foolishness, but which leave no blame at the parents' doorstep.

On the other hand, English pronouncements that disrespect a person's mother like the long-established "Your mother wears army boots" certainly are apt to cause anger to the target listener with the disparaged parent, yet the desire behind the insult is derision, plain and simple, without any added implication that the speaker can perceive in his or her object of ridicule the effects of being raised by such a mother.

Interestingly, a children's taunt in Japanese makes a claim that the listener's mother has a protruding belly button. Poor mothers! On the other hand, the English phrases "Like father, like son" or "The apple doesn't fall from the tree" appear only to be used when there is a plain pattern of bad behavior across the lines of descent. In the United States, in the absence of such evidence of generational misbehavior, we haven't really got a set phrase of condemnation like Oya no kao ga mitai. In that country, Americans are each free and independent in our stupid actions, evidently. Good grief!


Elwood is an associate professor of English and intercultural communication at Waseda University's School of Commerce. She is the author of "Getting Along with the Japanese." (Ask, 2001)

(May. 9, 2006)